Rage, rail, rave, and roar, says I.

One thing that really gets my goat is people’s misconception that because I am a writer, I can spew out lines of copy with a snap of my fingers.

Or their fingers, to be more precise.

I am not a robot, nor am I a production worker. I work with words inside my head. Have they never heard of creative thinking time? And there IS such a thing as writer’s block.

I swear, some people think we’re like a fast food restaurant. They order something and expect to get it in less than 15 minutes.

I’ve tried to explain many times that it just doesn’t work that way. Specifically, I don’t work that way. I need my thinking time if you want anything above crap.

And the other thing I really hate, sometimes enough to want to blow someone’s brains out, is being interrupted when I’m writing or thinking. A line of thought can be as delicate and tenuous as mere thread. One strong jolt and it breaks. Oftentimes, it scatters, and you have to go find and piece the fragments together again. Sometimes, those fragments get irreparably lost.

So I think my wrath is understandable in these cases. Although, I don’t really erupt in rage to show how upset I am. It makes matters worse, and besides, think of the stress and all the energy I must expend to work up a fury. I do get quite moody, though. Some people know me enough to realize the danger signs, and stay away.

For those who don’t, well, I might just snap. =P

It happened once. I was writing an article for a paper, and this alien from outer space decided to butt in and wouldn’t stop bugging me.

alien: So, Stef, I was wondering what you think about blah blah blah…?
me: Hmmm? (taps keyboard noisily)
alien: You know, I was just thinking what your opinion is blah blah?
me: Eh? (continues to type noisily) Sorry, I’m still writing…
alien: Just for a moment, I just wanna know blah blah…
me: (gives short answer and pointedly goes back to typing noisily)
alien: But what if blah blah blah blah?
me: Please? I’m trying to write.
alien: But I’m only blah blah…
me: Will you please shut up and let me concentrate? I need to finish this and YOU ARE BUGGING ME!
alien: (looking crestfallen) Stef, I never thought you could be so maldita.
me: (shoots fire from eyes and thinks you better leave now or you’ll see exactly how MALDITA I can be!)
alien: (runs away)

:P